Secretary eloquence: how to talk to people

When others are talking with great interest, are you willing to be a lining like a vase without saying a word? In order to avoid such embarrassment, do you find yourself excuses such as "I am not interested in the conversation", "I prefer to listen to others" or "I am very shy"? If you have done this before, and you really want to be a talker, then stop making these self-deceptions!
If you really think there is nothing to talk about, then you may want to find some topics yourself. The best way to find a topic is to read the newspaper. Don't read only those sports-related content or comic strips, but pay more attention to major events at home and abroad. Then you will find that there are many interesting things that will become the topic of conversation. However, it is not enough to want to be a popular rapper. It is more important to master some conversation skills. Here are 10 tips to learn from, I believe you will benefit a lot.
1. Be simple. The inexhaustible chatter is one of the most annoying problems in communication, and it is necessary to get rid of this problem. In fact, each of us did not intend to chatter when we were talking, but sometimes we confessed and digressed without knowing it. Let me tell you a simple way to talk, that is, when you talk to someone, imagine that you are making a long-distance call, so you have to shorten your conversation.
2. Avoid being self-centered. Self-speaking is only suitable for monologues on the stage, social occasions are not the stage, the opportunity to talk to everyone. It is unwelcome to talk about the content of the conversation.
3. Don't let anyone feel that they are excluded. Just as you don't want to be “turned a blind eye” by others, don't ignore any “listeners”. Even if we can't talk to everyone one by one, we should use our eyes to communicate with everyone.
4. Never hurt the feelings of the people around you. We must strive to make ourselves have an empathy ability. The so-called "empathy" refers to putting yourself in the position of others. If you are him, what will happen when you hear this topic. After mastering this ability, you will realize that some topics in the conversation are inconvenient to intervene. This will keep the atmosphere of our conversation friendly and harmonious, avoiding unnecessary embarrassment.
5. Actively participate in other people's discussions. If a few people are discussing something and you are interested in the issue and want to get involved, then the easiest and most effective way is to ask them questions. If the questions you ask are valuable, they will be eager to answer, so that you will become a member of the discussant.
6. Don't talk about other people's gossip. Talking about others behind the scenes or saying that it is detrimental to the honor and personality of others is the most difficult thing to tolerate and the most boring and boring thing. Of course we don't want others to talk about us behind the scenes, so we must never do anything like this. Always remember this famous saying: "Do not do what you want, don't do it to others."
7. Can argue with people, but don't argue. Quarreling is the enemy of friendly conversation. Those who argue with others will never become popular rappers. Even if your point of view is correct, once you take this boring way, you will lose the respect of others, and your original point of view will lose its vitality. Therefore, the best way we take to argue with others is: irrefutable facts and a gentle and courteous tone.
8. Watch out for your "listener" reaction. Talking to others is like driving a car. Always pay attention to the "traffic signal", know when to continue and when to stop. When the “listeners” show impatience or boredom, it is equivalent to a “red light”, suggesting that you should stop talking as soon as possible; in turn, when they are interested in what you are talking about, they will Showing a satisfactory look, this is a hint to you: "Continue your conversation."
9. Be good at listening and be interested in what others are talking about. In conversation, listening and speaking are just as important. When we are not interested in the content of the conversation, we are easy to think of other things. This way we will miss some important content, and sometimes we will not know what it is, which is very rude. Therefore, if you have this kind of "love to make a small difference" problem, you must try to change it, put away the impatient expression on your face, and remember: an unfriendly "listener" can never be a friendly The rapper.
10. Never interrupt others. It is the most impolite behavior to intervene at any time, occasionally, or ask irrelevant questions when others are talking. We all know very well that there is no need to talk more.
In short, to be a good talker requires a high level of skill, this technique can even be said to be an art. Mastering this art, you will become a popular rapper. Then you will find that talking is not only an interesting thing, it will also give you an unexpected gain.