Different circles, no need to force

I have a very good colleague, you all know that she is called Wang Ye. As everyone knows, the style of the prince’s maverick is simply intoxicating. But soon I found a problem. Wang Ye didn't have so many friends in the company, so I couldn't help but ask her if she felt lonely.

From the hometown of Qianlitun to Shanghai, there are no relatives and no friends, time is squeezed by work to talk about a love, feel extravagant, such a life, a person really can live? Later, Wang Ye asked me: "The definition of loneliness, What is it? Putting you in a group of people, do you feel lonely when you are laughing and screaming with them? Is the so-called friend a tool to solve your loneliness?"

When the prince asked, I couldn’t answer it.

Wang Ye said: "Only people who do nothing can feel lonely. Friends are casual encounters in the field of like-mindedness, not groups that are acquainted with each other in order to highlight their popularity."

At that time, Sunny had just transferred from the sweater group and sat opposite the prince. When I first arrived, I took a double snack on the first day and handed it to the prince at rest, and distributed it to the people around me. At noon, Sunny asked other people in the group where to eat. Everyone voted to eat udon noodles. She took the initiative to take out her mobile phone and said, "I have bought it! How many people?" In the afternoon, everyone was lazy. Chat, talking about the weekend party, Sunny can not help but come and say: "There is a very good place, I often go!" However, in this case, Sunny often exchanged a hot face with cold ass. Not only will everyone interrupt the topic, but even the participants don’t know why they are plugged in to the inexplicable guy.

Sunny added the WeChat to everyone in the group. As long as there was a friend who was in a circle, she was the first to praise, and then said a bunch of happy words. But what other people look at is that no matter how many responses there are under the state, no one will reply to her. Similarly, under each state of her, there is basically no praise or comment from anyone in the group.

In November of each year, the company will organize a suburban tourism. Because of public funds, basically people from all over the company will participate. But soon there was a problem. In order to save money, the company usually arranged two employees to live in one room, so Chi Hui, who was assigned to Sunny, soon became unhappy. However, there were no other people in the group who were willing to change rooms with Chi Hui. So Chi Hui and her general affairs nephew said that they had quietly changed the list, saying that there was a problem before and they needed to be regrouped. This kind of thing couldn't be stopped in the mouth of everyone in the office, and Sunny soon heard about it from other people. Eventually, Sunny went to the general affairs office and said that there was something on the day that might not be able to participate.

At lunch time, I chatted with Wang Ye and said that she was actually very poor. Wang Ye looked down on the squid rice and ignored me. I went on to say, "Really, I think the people in your group are actually a bit too much." Wang Ye swallowed the meal in his mouth and looked at me and said, "Poor? She is too cheap to see social friendship. How can I eat and drink?" If you just talk about it, you will become friends with others. Although you have to say something about your feelings, you have to respond to it, but if you don’t even look at the object before you pay, you will ask for it. Knowing those who are completely different from their own values. Is it necessary for people to talk about weddings and funerals every day? I feel that spending a second with them is a waste of time. Some people can be classified as friends, but some people can only stop at colleagues - Except for working relationships, we have no other intersections."

The next afternoon, I noticed that as long as someone called Sunny to do things, Sunny would be very happy to help, but after the help, in addition to a simple "thank you", others did not give Sunny too good looking face. Originally in such a situation, everyone would only do their own thing, walking on their own tracks, no one would stop for someone, and no one would hand a paper towel for those who were wronged and weeping. . After work, a large group of dinner, missing Sunny in the list, she only smiled and said: "It doesn't matter, I happened to meet people, I will not go." I did not finish the matter, and said later to the leader, In the end, I was too busy to overdo it. When I punched down the stairs, I thought about not going, I sent a message to the leader, I was going to the convenience store to buy a loaf of bread, but I found Sunny sitting in the chair of the convenience store to eat lunch.

Originally, I wanted to say hello. Who knows but was caught by one hand. Looking back, it is Wang Ye.

"She has been sitting for a while, and she must be in a bad mood. If you go up and call her, it will only make her jealous." Wang whispered to me. Why do I suddenly see the prince suddenly appear, Wang Ye shrugged and said: "You know that I don't like to participate in those messy gatherings, I went to buy something nearby, a little thirsty, come in and buy water to see her."

If I didn't read it wrong, Sunny's eyes were a little red, and she was eating bread slowly, looking at her mobile phone from time to time.

That day, Wang and I sat next to the Apple flagship store on Nanjing Road. Wang Ye and I told a story. She said that when everyone is stupid, there is a time when she is the same. When I was in college, I met new friends through my friends. I always felt that I could get along with them. But I didn’t expect them to be included in the circle. There were activities or things, and you would not be chosen. For the participants. A lot of looks like a match is just a play, don't think that you are heartbroken, others will be kind to your friendship. Sometimes, a group of people talk about things, in fact, you are not interested at all, but still want to interject and agree, thinking that others will notice you because of this, in fact, in the end, they are playing a one-man show.

Wang Ye looked at me and said, you always worry that I don't have friends in the company. I always think that friends are attracted to each other because of the gas field, not deliberately. It’s like I’m talking to you. It seems that there’s never been any special ceremony. I’m telling the world that “we are friends,” but we are still very happy. Therefore, I have never made friendship cheaper in order to solve the problem of "lonely." Different circles, no need to be strong, have always been the values ​​I believe in. Dream weaving content management system

I said, then we should go and talk to Sunny about these things. I think you should persuade her. On the one hand, you are a girl, on the other hand, you have experienced the same feelings.

Wang Ye shook his head and threw the finished drink bottle into the trash can. He said, "Never think of who you are the savior. We can't save others. Believe me, let her live, except for the accidental arrangement of God. Only her own is completely awake."

Wang Ye said, Zhou, let me talk about things around me. I had a friend before, and I was very close to it. Two people have known each other for many years. Later, she began to mix entertainment circles. At first, she was not happy. She often called me and said that the small groups around me were basically difficult to squeeze in. Although everyone seemed to know each other, others never talked and joked. Because everyone else is recording and making movies. She also tried very hard to be in line with those people. In fact, her conditions are not bad, just lack of opportunities.

When the opportunity arrives, the album is released, and a friend in the circle is sent a past, saying that I hope that everyone will give pointers, but actually hope that others can think of themselves at certain moments. However, after the record was sent, there was almost no echo. After asking a few months later, the other person suddenly realized that he did sign something, but he did not pay attention to it in the corner. She just laughed kindly, saying it doesn't matter, I have time to listen. But everyone is very busy, no one will notice you when you are not strong enough.

After a few years, the wind and water turned, and new people entered the circle, she became a predecessor. Perhaps the time is right, or maybe she is getting better and better, and she suddenly jumped to the front, and many people began to notice her. At this time, the friends who did not put her in the heart began to associate with her, as if those who did not care and did not pay attention before. After all, if you still have a hard foundation, there will be no so-called "bark" and "please".

The prince smiled a little, and then said that she said that she was very calm when she talked about her life. The circles that once seemed extraordinarily sacred, when they really stepped in, found a mess. Everyone wears a hypocritical mask, doing two-faced pies, and smashing people who may have just smiled and chatted a second before. Finally, I pulled out and returned to myself, only to understand that they did not belong to those circles at the beginning. Friends, after all, are not begging.

Although Wang Ye insisted that these things should not be reminded, I still wrote an email to Sunny privately. There is not much content. I just told her that instead of wasting time on others, it is better to spend time on myself. When I got off work, I received a Sunny email with only two simple words: Thank you.

Sunny began to work very hard on her own work, and she tried to get the leadership as much as possible, but there were too many people in the group, everyone had a strong desire to express, and Sunny was still drowning among the crowd. There aren't many people working overtime in the office. Sunny is one of them. Because there are no co-workers and no extra arrangements, she often does things late in the grid. Dedecms.com

Everyone said that because Sunny was paralyzed by her boyfriend, no one wanted it, and it would end up like this. When Wang Ye heard it in the tea room, he couldn’t help but go back to the sentence: "A few days ago, I just saw her boyfriend bought a rose and waited for her downstairs. I don’t know if you all saw it, you can’t suppress it. "At the end, everyone has nothing to say."

After half a month, Sunny applied for a transfer, but the personnel told her that there were no staff in the other groups. Finally, Sunny said she could accept the assignment. At that time, there were not many overseas firms. It was not difficult to apply, but many local employees did not want to go to such a remote place, because wages were not much higher than domestic prices, and the environment was worse than domestic ones. But Sunny still insisted on applying, turned back to my seat, handed me a bottle of yogurt, and said, "Thank you." Sunny smiled very easily, and then began to pack things.

After Sunny went overseas, every time we had a video conference, we could basically see her. I heard that after she went overseas, she soon became the backbone. Because there are few people, the social circle is simple. Everyone has not so many ideas. They just want to work happily and the atmosphere is very good. Later, when Sunny came back as a representative of the overseas office, those colleagues had suddenly asked to ask Dong to the West, as if they were greeted by returning friends. Sunny rose three levels in a year, and I talked to Wang Ye, Wang Ye smiled, so that she finally knows what she wants, which is more important than anything else.

Sunny came over and greeted me with Wang Ye. I said, watching you get better and better, I am really happy for you. Sunny laughed generously and said, thank you for your letter. Turned and said to the prince, there is still your bread.

I looked at Wang Ye slightly, and Wang Ye shrugged and said that she did not understand. Sunny said: "Although it has been a long time, I still remember that when I was sitting in a convenience store that day, when you were hungry, the bread you handed me. You said that although bread is not as good as food, at least when you are hungry, you can The belly, then signal that you have one on your hand. You may not know, the importance of that moment to me, when everyone goes to the party, you are willing to share a bread with me. Although we usually do not talk much, but I know You regarded me as a friend. At that time, I always envied your ability, and later I realized that what attracted you was that you never insist on others and insist on self-esteem."

Before Sunny returned overseas, she sent a message to Wang Ye. She asked, how can we really do not care? Wang Ye returned a sentence: strong enough to let others care about you. Sunny returned a smile and she said she understood.

I used to worry that Wang Ye is a person who has no friends. He will be lonely, will be lonely, and will lose his sense of existence because no one is connected. But gradually, I realized that the sense of existence has never been given by others. Only if I am too weak, there is not enough weight to exist in the world. Content from dedecms

My wife and I are sitting on the rooftop and drinking coffee. It's just two simple people. We never go kite to please each other, and we don't want to integrate into each other's circles. A true friend will accept you because of your goodness, not because of your kindness and deliberation. You don't need to please the world, just wait for someone who is attracted to your quality, take the initiative and be happy to come with you.