Goodbye, poor teenager

I often calm down and will remember you.

You grew up in strange cities and spent most of your time dealing with strangers. So you started to learn how to put on a hippie smile. It’s just that you can’t hide your taciturn nature.

You don't know when to start and you want to prove yourself. But often it is counterproductive. You often prove that you have failed, and you will also get a look from your parents, "Let you not listen to us."

At that time, you are barren. You always want to prove yourself in the presence of those who use it as a mirror. Like your father.

That year, your father often made you feel that he was proud of you in front of you. You are envious and disdainful. You can often feel his disappointment from you in your tone.

You skip classes every day and walk in the streets. You also learn to be proud and unforgettable. There is no way to cover up your poverty in essence. You look like nothing to parents. When everyone's parents advise their children not to be with you, you are persuading their children not to learn to smoke. Because you have never been able to fool yourself. You are not willing to be a person with nothing.

You often read a book all day in the bookstore, and when you ask your parents if you are going to the Internet cafe, you will not deny it. You feel that everything is contrary to their wishes, and there is a kind of darkness that they make for themselves.

In the end, you got severe punishment and was sent to a faraway place, one person going to high school. Loneliness has become your good friend. During the holiday, you sit in the dormitory and watch the classmates happily pack their bags and go home, until you are alone, you actually cried. When you sit alone under the lawn and watch people in the distance celebrate Mid-Autumn Festival, you actually imagine that the moon in the sky can reflect the faces of distant relatives.

You think of Dad who talked to you for no more than five sentences a year. You took out a stack of stationery, painted it, and finally wrote a letter. You are throwing into the mailbox with anxiety. Admitting that the rebelliousness of the past made him go a lot of detours, and finally admitted that the way he had proved himself was naive and ignorant. Finally, you receive a reply from Dad. When you went home that year, you gave Dad a hug for many years.

In the year of the joint entrance exam, Dad patted you on the shoulder and said that when the son came back, he was a college student. Dad’s long-lost expectations, so that you finally have to face the problem you have been escaping. Every year, you learn the anger and anger in the entrance examination system, but it is just to cover up the university and you are so unattainable.

Until you see "Italian", an article about the joint entrance examination is called "Never Give Up." You are very touched, you carefully tear it down, and still cherish it in your wallet today. You finally face yourself honestly for the first time. In fact, you are eager for your parents to be happy again, just like when you were home with all kinds of first place.

Every night in that year, from computer games to the stars and moons that hang in the sky late at night. You endorse at night and attend classes during the day. Look at the teacher as tired as a nerd. The teacher once told you that it is a miracle that you can go to a specialist. But in the end you went to the university department.

From that day on, you begin to understand that persistence will make a lot of things meaningful.

Not long after that, you wrote down the first article, written to yourself ten years later, filled with your illusions about the future. But in exchange for a mockery of the message board. You almost gave up. So you quickly flipped out of the wallet and read again, "Never give up."

Of course, I have a little IQ, and I understand that if my dream is still only a dream, it is best not to say it. Stay in the bottom of my heart and protect it, don't let it be hit, don't let it be lost, it can stay with you unswervingly.

Later, you were the editor of the website for the first time, and you were so excited that you could sleep all night. You were drafted for the first time, and you looked excitedly for a long time. You especially cherish that opportunity, write the manuscript to the early morning, and then change it with the editor, and finally have the "Chongqing, Chongqing."

Later, others continue to find your draft, and you write to the early morning again. Unfortunately, the computer has a blue screen midway, and you find that you have written nothing. You sorted out your mood and wrote it again. When the sun rose, you finished the manuscript. Although not in the end.

You are beginning to thank the ups and downs of growth, not always in the greenhouse, the honor and the shadow like you, have always been with you, you already know that you will not be lucky, and will not always be enzymes.

The spirits you used to be poor, but all the way to their own feelings carefully stored them. Basically, when they tried to rebel, they suffered from the bitterness brought about by various ignorances, but they silently turned them into sweetness, and watered every yesterday that gradually drifted away.

Finally one day, I can happily say to you, goodbye, once the poor boy. Thank you for your inferiority, I feel that I need to go up and down, and I need to cherish every moment and detail that is warm enough and motivating you.

Nowadays, I often think of you, as if I can see you coming along the way to me; stumbling, muddy, lonely and often misunderstood, but you are not sitting on the ground like you were when you were young, You lifted your dirty hands and wiped your face, still smiling at the world. You are ordinary and ordinary, but in the end it has not become useless.