No one can take you to the road, except for yourself

In a douban online event, there was a girl who wrote her anxiety:

"If you want to graduate, your work is not settled; the students around you are all settled, and you are left, it really feels abandoned by the world; emotional aspects, various meanings of various levels and even various things, are often abandoned. Groups, classmates, Of course, it also includes friends or something. The parents feel that they are particularly uncomfortable. When they are old, they are still working as locusts to ruin rice. Even the whole family is bothering me, my grandfather and good friends see work. No matter what is indiscriminate, I will call me to recommend me. My mom also asks for no news. I have participated in the job fair, and I have applied online several times. For various reasons, I have no end in the end. The pressure is quite big... I have been looking for it. I don’t think I’m sorry for my family. I thought about finding a part-time job and I don’t think it’s suitable for this festival. I’ve been in the house for half a year. I want to die every day...”

This reminds me of a difficult time I have spent.

This period of time was not just when I graduated, but after a year and a half of graduation, I did a part-time job that year. The work is not dense, and the income is just enough for me to eat. That is my most anxious time.

I was assigned to Shenyang in the year of graduation, and the librarian who worked there for three months did not do anything. Except for boring, I didn’t make much money. The more important thing was that I was in a period of love, I always thought. go to Beijing. It happened that my mother who had been divorced for more than ten years suddenly committed suicide by taking poison. So when I went home to finish the funeral, I went straight to Beijing. At the end of the year, I asked my wife to marry him. I didn’t care what was mourning. It was a big filial piety. But looking for a job after going to Beijing is relatively smooth. It may be that my request is low. When others say that I am good at writing, let me go to the draft. This year, I can say that the work is still smooth, not much, but there is no such emotion as this girl.

Good attitude until I left the company.

After I left, I started to send resumes, but unfortunately, I have more than 100 resumes, but only seven or eight. After thinking back and forth, I think that time may be a hell. Seven or eight replies, I went to the interview. But without exception, there was no following. For three months, I began to panic. Because no income is not conducive to eating soft rice. My wife doesn't earn much.

So I started to get bad temper and have bad emotions. I will take a nervous comparison between those who have a background at home and myself. Telling others, telling my wife, I am totally because I have nothing to rely on. At that time I used all the unfavorable factors to explain why I failed. For example, my mother committed suicide, my father died early and so on. When people ask about work, they will deliberately transfer to this topic. A lot of Barabara, in fact, just want to tell each other, I am so mixed now, because my aunt died. There is no backing. Always avoiding your own problems and not facing them.

This tragic self-destructive and misbehaving behavior lasted for a small year. I later found out that this way, our little home will be finished. Although my wife is a good wife waiting for the world, but I watched her tortured by my decadence and incompetence, I am also very upset. So I feel that I have to find a reliable job to do first. The determination is down, but the resume is still sinking. The classmates and friends asked about the situation. At that time, the good face did not tell the truth to others. So when you really want to go under the sun, you find that all your deception has consumed up your credit. I can only find my own way.

At that time, I faced the same dilemma as this girl. The relatives of her family introduced me to the opportunity to test the civil servant's office, recommend me what kind of work, such as the end plate, and even some people suggested that I go to the coal kiln. The thing I was most afraid of at the time was to receive a call from their family. Anxious, I ask my wife every day, what kind of person I am, and I am in a state of extreme inferiority and self-doubt. My wife of course always supports me. But it can't make me change. Every time I ask her what kind of person I am, it is more like a kind of coquetry. She enlightened me countless times, but I still can't get out of the huge sense of failure.

I even wanted to do a few extreme things during that time to find a sense of existence.

I later came out of that horrible nightmare-like state of life. In addition to my own determination, the biggest change to me was actually because many people praised a few understatements!

I wrote an inspirational book at the company in 2008, which is actually a draft. If the book is academically eye-catching, the garbage is worthless, and it is not as good as the soul chicken soup by the standards of today's best-selling books. But at the time, after reading it, many people thought it was not bad. When I looked through the comments on this book on the website, I found that many people thought it was well written. And I later heard my classmates praise me for writing well. Of course, with their taste at the time, this kind of compliment may not be very objective.

But these small details have greatly increased my self-confidence. This is why I did not care about my praise when I faced the real Luther. I always think maybe I am not a real compliment, it is also very important in ta. Then why don't I be happy? And Luther is not nothing, it is a flash of people. It’s not a bad thing to praise the flash.

I have had a few days to rebuild my confidence by searching for how others evaluate my book. Finally, I feel that I am not completely useless. So I went to another group company with a scalp. I only worked for more than two months in this company, but it was very important for more than two months. Although nothing was created, I found that the editors I knew at the time were not as good as me. So when I resigned, I went directly to a better book company in the industry. Since then, the mentality has begun to change on the positive side.

So after I saw the words spoken by the girl in the activity, I wrote a sentence: I think you need to be encouraged. I don't know much about you, but as Stephen Chow said, everyone has her value, even if she is a piece of toilet paper.

Now I am mixed even though. But I think my mentality can be very good. Everything in life is also developing in the right direction. Just looking back at the beginning, I suddenly felt that as long as I don’t drill into the dead end, no one can catch you. If you are facing difficulties, even if you have a thorn in the road, there will always be a spring and autumn. When the time comes, everything may be completely new.