Inspirational novel: My suffering, my university (6)

Inspirational novel: my suffering my university

[I am like the hard-working Jingwei, stone by piece, different, it is filling the sea, and I am filling in life. 】

One day, 11-year-old Meihua asked me: "Sister, when can we stay at home?" I remember that I said a vicious words to my sad sister: "One is to marry, the other is to die." And death, then really became my longing goal.

To open the name of the journal, the stepfather did not mention anything about my school. I am brave in my uneasiness, and I ask my stepfather: Dad, can I study? It was night, eating, and my stepfather took a chopstick pickle and sipped a big mouthful of rice on the threshold, leaving a silent back to me. My mother was very tempered and immediately rushed to my father. "My daughter is talking to you. Are you jealous?" I was cold in my heart. I knew by experience that a noisy battle is about to start.

The stepfather said with a sigh of relief: "If I am stunned, I will save your shit! I have looked at your maiden, and I am exhausted! I can’t think of it. I can’t read it. ... "The stepfather when he was angry could shock the whole small Jingshan, the mother burst into tears, and the mother's grievances could understand: The stepfather regretted marrying her, why did she regret not marrying her stepfather?

I and Meihua shivered in the corner of the room, and my stepfather’s words were like a knife, and I stabbed my heart! In an instant, my heart is ashamed: I don't study!

I opened the bag and found the offer notice and folded it into my pocket. Before going to sleep, I opened the door and went out.

At the doorstep is a river that leads to the Yangtze River, and the river in summer is full. The river under the moonlight sparkles with a soft, loving glow. I carefully waded down the water, and the coolness of the water made me feel good all the time. I took out the admission notice from my pocket and placed it on the water. I took a hand and it went with the waves. Again, it drifted farther, and soon it floated into a little white spot, and I watched it go. Then, go ashore and go home.

I became the smallest quarry girl on the mountain. 14 years old.

The scenery of the stone is different. The Wuhu Iron and Steel Plant does not want to "inch", but instead of "bowl stone", as the name implies, it is the stone of the mouth. Eight cents a penny a ton. The meteorite tool is updated. The stepfather prepared me a big one, two small hammers, a 10 pound, and an 18 pound. The task of the 18-pound hammer is to smash the big rock that can't be moved into a small stone that can be carried. The task of the 10-pound hammer is to make the small stone into a qualified "bowl stone." There is also a spade, a shovel and an iron fork. Every day I look at these iron guys "to work", they get my shoulders hurt and hurt, they fight against my bones, they are hard, and my bones are harder. For a long time, I didn’t feel any pain.

The stones on the mountain are only available in two colors. A dark blue color with a bit of dark green. This kind of stone is often one piece, about 10 cm thick. It is suitable for paving roads, lower foundations, and barrier walls. This kind of bluestone is brittle, as long as the force is in place, one When the hammer goes down, it will crack and be sharp and angular. Such stones are best smashed, and people who smash stones like to grab this bluestone, but there are not many stones on the mountain.

The other one is brown. This kind of stone is stubborn and hard. It is not easy to smash. A ton of heavy boulders can't be done well. In the end, it becomes a hard and round bone. It can only be used again. The wind drill hits a blasthole, puts about 100 grams of TNT to blast it, then breaks them with a crusher, sends it to steel making or burning lime, and the gravel is suitable for paving.

There are so many unsatisfactory stones on the mountain. Once a cannon is put down, it is always tens of tons down. The imposing momentum is spectacular and thrilling. When shooting, people hid in the anti-gun hole like a sparrow, chanting the number of guns, listening to the roar of the stone, talking about which gun's strength is big, which gun is a smoulder, which gun became a dumb gun. When the guns stopped, people were like ducks that had caged out, screaming and running to grab stones. There are rules in the stone, and the mountain is on the mountain. The "self-employed" on the mountain are all nearby villagers. Each one has a "king of the mountain". Every family has a place of their own. The unwritten rule is that the stone that is blown down by the cannon falls. Whose family is on the site, others can not cross the border to pick up, otherwise, it is a dog bloody, but the big hit. In this small society that relies entirely on brute force, everyone has a set of self-protection and external resistance. Some people are famous for their fierceness. Some people are famous for their arrogance. Some people are famous for their lives. In the mountains, there are too many examples of rushing to grab the stones. I don’t have any power. In order to avoid trouble, I went to the mountain to find a place that has not been mined, no one occupied, and started my Meteorite career.

The source of raw materials is difficult because my site is not mined. I first picked up some gravel from the mound, but I didn't have two days to "sit in the mountains." Then I started to take the action of "eating". I saw that some people had too many stones on the field, and finally they were pulled by the workers. I begged people: "You have more stones in your house, instead of letting them get on the crusher, give me something good?" This kind of pleading is generally more effective. But there are also arrogant, I would rather not give me the crusher, I only blink dry.

There is also a situation in which people have more stones, they only favor small stones that are labor-saving, and they are dismissive of those struggling big stones. I will pick up the big stones that these people don't want, use a sledgehammer to smash them one by one, and then put them on a small cart and transport them to my field. I am like the hard, fine guard, stone by piece, differently, it is filled with hate, and I am filling in life.

[I wiped my tears, got up, picked up my hammer, and vented hatred to the stone. The stone shattered under my hammer. I understood the truth. All the stones that were pressed against oneself had to be subverted and smashed. No one else could help you. 】

The beginning of my rock was not going well. The biggest difficulty is that I almost look down on those iron guys, especially the 18-pound hammer. The trembling screamed and it was soft and weak on the stone. Sometimes it’s awkward, it’s not that my legs are unlucky, or the stone powder flies into my eyes. Going home every day, you can't add new marks to your legs. The hands are gradually polarized. Ten fingers are worn away by the moving stones. The bright red tender meat touches the pain; while the palms are thick and thick, and the needles are stuck in five millimeters. After a few months, my face was dark, my arms were thick, and my strength was strong. At the age of 15, I looked as big as 20 years old. This is tempered and mature.

Once, I bet a person for a piece of money, and within a half hour, I opened a nearly ton heavy boulders. That stone is also mad. When the gun was fired the first day, it just fell on my home. Generally speaking, such a large boulder should be fried with explosives. However, when I asked the squad leader of the mine to shoot and blast, the squad leader said that the stone had cracks and could be smashed without having to shoot. However, no miner is willing to make this hard work. I asked several people, and everyone said that the stone is so big, what good is it for me? Stone is on my home, others are natural, and I am anxious. When I was angry, I said, I am here to show you.

This time, the miners are coming. Someone said that you broke my money and gave you a piece of money. Another person said, I also add one. However, limited time, smashing is effective within half an hour. I said you don't want to. When I was carrying an 18-pound hammer and standing on a boulder and smashing a hammer, it was quite a bit of a cool taste. It was the most tiring time of the stone. For half an hour, except for sweating, there was no rest, and the sweat and even the pants were soaked. The boulder gradually became smaller and smaller, and finally became a pile of bowls of stone. Later, a full-frozen slab was installed, which was more than one ton. The miners who bet with me have lost two dollars, which makes me a little worried. However, I still don't regret this boulder. After all, the money it sells belongs to me.

In the mountains, the most difficult thing is to grab the stone. When my site was mined by the miners, it suddenly became a treasure. There are people around the front and back around. Every time the gunfire has not stopped, there will be a bold start to run into the hall, and the stone will be robbed on the stone wall. In order to defend my site and the stone is not invaded, I have fought bravely against the aggressors. Rockstone's career has trained my personality. I am no longer the weak and helpless little girl. I have learned to defend myself.

Often fighting with me is a girl named Lan Lan, who is 3 years older than me. She is a wind gunner on the mine. She has always been arrogant and bully. She not only grabbed my stone, but even my site was in vain. We used to play a boundary pile at the border, which is the boundary, but she always moved to the boundary pillar when I was not in the room. This dark and despicable technique made me particularly annoyed. I told her, she didn't, she opened her mouth. Most of the girls who smashed stones on the mountain had never read the book. The small society that relied on brute force to eat followed the weak meat. Generally, I have to bear the word first, because I have always remembered the mother's warning: in the small Jingshan area, we are foreigners, no friends and relatives to help, try not to provoke the wrong.

When Lanlan spit and cursed my family's ancestors for eight generations, I finally couldn't bear it, raising her hand to give her two loud slaps. So we twisted into a ball, she grew tall, and her strength was naturally bigger than me. I was crushed to the ground by her death. We were like two barbaric little beasts rolling on the gravel-filled ground. go with. In the end, we were opened by the miners. We were all wounded, blood and sweat, and we were all overwhelmed. We hate each other, gnashing our teeth, panting, and a sleepy beast.

Lanlan’s brother came down from the mountainside. I hoped that he was coming to mediate and speak for us. I didn’t expect that this seemingly wise guy actually said nothing, mentioning my collar, like an eagle. I threw me a few meters away like a chicken. Life is so cruel! Who made me no brother? Who made me alone? Crying is useless. The only way is to make yourself strong and not timid in the face of a tough opponent. I wiped my tears, got up, picked up my hammer, and vented hatred to the stone. The stone shattered under the hammer of my hammer. I understand the truth: all the stones that are pressed against oneself, only have to subvert and smash themselves. No one can help you! Life is so cruel, and the philosophy of life is as simple as that.

[Nervity and fear make my heart beat like a drum. It is very easy to go on now, but I am not willing to give up halfway. I bite, let's go, if I don't even dare to climb a hill, what else can I do in the future? 】

At noon, after the miners got off work, I was bet on the sixty-nine sons of the stone and see if anyone could climb up the mountain through the safety rope, then climb down, not to tie the safety rope to the waist, only to catch In the hand. I have never had such crazy thoughts and actions. In the subconscious, I seem to want to prove my courage and let those who are always bullying me look at my timidity.

Sixty-nine sons are a boy, two years older than me, often like a dexterous monkey, squatting on the mountain. He is naturally not afraid. And I, looking up at the steep stone walls, crumbling dangerous stones, I feel that the mountain will be the top pressure. My heart and legs jumped together. Although the mountain is not high, it is more than 200 meters, but it is a vertical climb! But I don't want to back down. Lan Lan is here. Zhou Xiaojin and Zhou Xiaojiu are also picking up stones on the ground not far away. I must climb up successfully and cannot retreat.

I and the sixty-nine sons smashed the same safety rope one after the other, the rope was too thick, and my hand could hardly hold it. The rope was used by miners to shoot and smash stones, and the other end was tied to a boulder behind the mountain. Sixty-nine sons climbed in front of me. He said that he was a boy and should be "a leader." I wore a liberation shoe that had been flattened. It was always down on the stone wall, and the whole body was concentrated on the arms of the two ropes. Just climbed a few steps up, the trembling rope led to the loose small stones on the stone wall, and fell down. Liu Jiuzi quickly called me to bow, only to hear the small stones slamming on the hard hat we wore. Some gravel rubbed my hand and fell, my hand hurts a bit, it must be broken. Tension and fear make my heart beat like a drum. It is very easy to go on now, but I am not willing to give up halfway. I bite, let's go, if I don't even dare to climb a hill, what else can I do in the future?

It’s easy to climb to a smooth boulder on the mountainside. I sweat and sigh like a cow. I turned and looked down, heaven! Lan Lan and others are squirming like gnomes, and there are stones everywhere at the foot of the mountain. I can't imagine what it would be if I fell now. Liu Jiuzi said with a smile: Now it is not a splitting of the brain, separation of the limbs, just a piece of meatloaf!

I didn't dare to look down again, only clenched my teeth and climbed up. When I climbed a piece of protruding rock, I once had my feet hanging. At the moment of struggle, I thought I really wanted to fall. I shouted in horror and my feet were screaming. I heard the following exclaim. I can imagine that everyone is watching my ocean. My mother just sent me lunch, and I said to myself: "You are a debt collector, don't you want to die? Come down, come down quickly--" I wore a red, short-sleeved shirt that day, more eye-catching, down the mountain Almost everyone is looking up at my face. The mother’s shouting is full of crying. I have to cry too. Now I am in a dilemma, I am hanging in the air. I regret not being able to do it. I shouldn’t bet with Liu Jiuzi. I shouldn’t hang my fifteen-year-old life on a rope.

In the end, it was still sixty-nine, the seventeen-year-old boy who had been married for three years, and used his huge arm to pull the rope up. When I stepped on the solid land at the top, I lay down on the ground and didn't get up for a long time.

Sixty-nine sons said to me, you are not ordinary, have never seen such a strong, brave little girl, you are the most daring girl in Xiaojingshan for many years. I have been a little bit stunned by the great panic--Yes, I am confident that I am very strong, but this is life-forced. After I went home that day, I wrote about the feeling of climbing in the days. Finally, I wrote: This is just the first hill I climbed. How many cliffs have I climbed in my life?

[I sacrificed my education for this family. The little shoulders have resisted the burden of the family too early, but they don’t even let me see it. This is my only hobby! My heart is like a knife, tears are flowing, my eyes are crying. I first thought of leaving the world. 】

In order to earn more money from the stone, and to avoid unnecessary war with the Lanlan, I always go up the mountain and go home at the latest. I insist on smashing four tons of stone every day, enough to pull the Sanmao slab, so that I can earn at least every day. It’s about three dollars. One month to remove the rainy days and Sundays, at least you can earn seven or eighty dollars, you can help the stepfather to hold up half a home.

I like to have a moon at night. One person is smashing stones on the mountain. Although the mountain will be fired, the coffin or human bones buried in the mountains will always be blown up. Although Lanlan’s father was killed when he was shooting a few years ago, I heard that There are many ghosts and ghosts on the mountain, but I never realized it. I like that no one has to grab stones at night, and I can calmly smash stones; I like my lonely rock to echo in the empty mountains; I like the moon to look at my labor; I like to accumulate a little hope of tomorrow. More importantly, I am afraid to go home and see the gloomy face of my parents. They will have a fight in three or two days, all of which are financially strapped. Sometimes, because of the lack of stone resources, I will not be able to complete four tons of "tasks" one day. When I went home, my stepfather asked, and his face immediately hangs down. I am most afraid of parents quarreling, as long as they get along with each other, even if I let ten tons of stone a day, I am willing.

I often think of such a question: Is it a very sad thing for a child to come to the night and not want to go home? Perhaps, it is these tempering and experience that have caused me to lose my attachment to my home, so that I will leave home afterwards, and I will have the idea of ​​being wandering around the world and choose to be independent.

The most difficult thing about 砸 stone is the summer. The temperature in the open-air mine is as high as five or sixty degrees. The bright sun sizzles the stone and smokes. Even if you wear thick canvas gloves to move the stone, you can feel the burning from the stone heart. A drop of sweat dripped onto the stone, and only heard the "Zi" sound, the watermark turned white. There is no wind in the mouth of the hall that has been dug into the ground. To breathe, you have to open your mouth like an oxygen-deficient fish. Or in the gap of the rest, drill into the shade, sit down and use the straw hat to fan the wind. Fortunately, the tea is supplied to the mine. When the workers go to work, some people specially pick a cup of herbal tea and put it in the shelter. Everyone uses a water to drink water, and no one pays attention or taboos. In such an environment, there is no qualification for taboos and taboos.

Sometimes when I am resting, I sit under the roots of the mountain, looking up at the unpredictable heights and steep stone walls, smelling the sour and bun sweat from my body, pondering the palms of my old man, and suddenly feeling the fate. Like a boulder pressed against me, it is oppressive, heavy, and difficult to subvert. Although I have successfully climbed Xiaojingshan and smashed the boulder that men are also timid, more or less set a little dignity for themselves, but what can change? I am still just a little girl who lives on a stone. The only thing that has changed is that my self-confidence has increased. Therefore, I often look at the more and more small hills, the more people think about it, I worry that it will be taken out quickly, then what do I rely on to live?

At noon in the summer, there are no other people besides me in the mountains. People are taking a lunch break. It is not until three o'clock in the afternoon, the sun is going to work on the west, because the noon's mouth is so hot, people are very easy to dehydrate heatstroke. I used the time of noon to study. The book was borrowed from the miners. I still clearly remember the first historical novel I read in the Sui and Tang Dynasties. Every day at noon, I was sitting next to the crusher, where the terrain was high and there was a sunshade, very quiet. Occasionally there will be a glimmer of wind through this place, here is my reading paradise at noon in summer. Going home at night, I will write the reading experience of this day to the diary, and transcribe the famous sayings in the book. Those books, and those flashing words, lighted my gloomy 15-year-old sky like stars.

But I can't read at home, my stepfather is distressed by electricity. My sister and I lived in a small stone house that opened separately. It was separated from the wall where the parents lived. They could see the light in our cabin through the stone on the wall. If we kept the light in the cabin for more than ten minutes, The stepfather would not help but pull the electric gate, and the room would sink into the darkness when the moment, like a boat sinking into the sea, my heart is also. Lying in bed, smelling the stench of the pits that floated out of the window, the tears could not stop brushing out. The soreness of the whole body attacked me, and the most painful thing was my heart.

My mother was distressed by me. At the end of the month, I settled the stone mine. My mother would secretly give me one or two dollars as a reward. I can't afford to spend this money. When it's raining, when the open-pit mine can't work, I walked a dozen miles to the library in the city to buy a book or rent a set of comic strips in the small bookstore on the Ganggang Road. Look there for a long time. The mood of the day will be very pleasant, and the people who have been hungry for a long time have finally found food and water.

But fate seems to be destined to read is a luxury for me.

On one occasion, I bought two copies of "Three Songs of Songs" and "Meticulous Techniques" with three pieces of five cents that I used to save. The stepfather saw it and was furious. For him, this waste was simply sin. Unforgivable. The mother was furious and angry because she was found by her stepfather to give her private money. She couldn’t help but say that the two new books were stuffed into the burning stove. I was so angry that I first ran into my parents for the first time in my life: "You are too ignorant!"

My mother raised my hand and gave me a slap in the face. From small to large, my mother never beat me because I have always been so obedient. This slap in the face of my mother broke my heart, and I burst into tears. I sacrificed my education for this family. The little shoulders have resisted the burden of the family too early, but they don’t even let me see it. This is my only hobby! My heart is like a knife, tears are flowing, my eyes are crying. I first thought of leaving the world.