Why can't we insist on doing a little thing now?

Many people are confused and feel that no matter what they do, they are easy to quit halfway and can't stick to the end. This article analyzes in detail why there are seven reasons why you can't stick to it, and it's suitable for everyone in the puzzle.

We did not form a fixed sense of time rhythm.

In the high school stage, we are all relatively easy to insist on doing one thing. An important reason is that we have a good life. We get up on time every day, go to class on time, study on time, and sleep on time. In a regular life, people are prone to have relatively fixed controlled time to accomplish their stated goals.

At the university level, the schedule is not the same every day, and life has begun to have many possibilities. This means that while your life becomes rich, while you gain all kinds of freedom, you start to lose the sense of rhythm that you have developed in the past.

You start to slowly become people who are driven by different things, not those who insist on doing something at a fixed time.

This phenomenon promoted by fragmentation is not only in the university, but also in the workplace, it will become more and more serious. My first suggestion is: To develop a habit of persistence, you'd better let yourself have some time to do fixed things.

Why do I always recommend that you do some small things? For example, insist on writing a diary at a fixed time every day, practicing words, exercising, everything you like is good, do not need too much time, even if it is 15 minutes.

These little things will slowly form your new time anchor. With these time anchors, you can slowly develop a new sense of rhythm in your life in different environments. People with a sense of time can gradually control their time.

Everyone needs to understand that people who are unable to control their own time are more likely to feel tired, rather than those who have control over their own time. We are only more productive.

We did not find good like-minded people to encourage each other.

The more you interact with people, the more likely you are to become a person.

In high school, because of various systems and external constraints, everyone is collectively turned into a behavioral model, often able to go all out for a specific goal for a long time, chasing each other's incentives, many people feel that they have a full sense of high school learning. , and this environment is inseparable.

After I went to work, I had a lot of relationships with my old classmates from small to big, but I had a good relationship with some friends who were not in a city. I have found a feature that those of us who are well-played are often the same rhythm of life.

We did not choose an environment that is more suitable for the target.

We often lack companions with the same goals, which also makes it difficult for us to stand alone. After all, people are group animals, and it is difficult to get rid of the natural genetic behavior patterns of the herd.

In high school, even if your classmates don't ask for progress, I don't worry that you won't stick to it, because the class teacher, parents, and school form a network that has designed the daily behavior patterns for you. It is more appropriate for a high school in China to be a learning concentration camp model. Its success rate is at the expense of the individual's personality and the free will of the person.

But this model will allow you to break through at a certain point in the short term and stand out, so there are still reasons for its existence.

When you arrive at the university, whether it is a class teacher or a counselor, or a school, your management is very extensive. No one supervises you on self-study every day, even in class!

In this environment, many people will find that there is no external force constraint, and it is difficult for him to establish his own ability to control his behavior.

Not only universities, but even in the workplace, I am more opposed to working at home. Anyone who has actually run a company knows that letting new employees work from home instead of focusing on office management will not only result in work efficiency, but may also ruin a person's career because he will develop very bad work habits.

The vast majority of people leave the environment and do nothing. Want to enjoy a free life, provided that you have chosen a controlled life for yourself.

This is the skill that people like me who have been practicing for more than a decade can barely do. So everyone can understand why so many people in the postgraduate exams will go to the exams, one needs a peer environment, and the second requires an environment. Without this environment, they cannot restrain their behavior.

We have lost what we really want to do.

There is a freshman who has made a lot of plans and plans since the new semester. But he has hardly practiced it in a school year. Now he has no interest in class, whether he wants to read a novel, whether he wants to sleep, or whether he wants to be in a daze. However, after he regretted it, he was very entangled. He felt that he was sorry for his parents.

In college, he lived in chaos, could not see the hope, and lived in his own fantasy world, and even had the idea of ​​not wanting to read a book. He is annoyed and wants to change this situation, but he doesn't know what to do?

This is a bigger problem. Even if we can persist, the premise is to find a reason for persistence, or a goal.

In the high school stage, we have a clear goal, go to college, and be driven by our peers and the environment. When I arrive at the university, my employment will be very far away. After three years of postgraduate study, after 12 years of hard work, people want to relax for themselves. The university does not lack this kind of relaxation. But in this relaxed environment, we can't remember our own goals. This is the first question: there is no goal.

High school has a realistic goal of going to college and going to college. In fact, the university has a realistic goal of employment, just good business.

In order to get a good university, the high school stage has developed a test-oriented education system that is divided into orientations. Although this system affects the openness of people's thinking, it can help you get points.

In college, the curriculum system often makes you not see the relationship with the goal of employment. Its practicality and social reality are really out of touch. In the process of learning, you often don't see the difference between yourself and employment needs. Progress, just feel that I am getting mixed every day.

If you can't measure whether your distance from the target is closer, you will slowly forget your goal. Even slowly learning to use this thing to comfort myself is close to the goal, in fact, this is self-deception.

If you don't deceive yourself, college students should take the initiative to understand the employment units they want to go to in their freshman year, understand their jobs, understand the quality requirements of these positions, and take the initiative to define their own goals and means of realization in their freshman year. Find the right means to measure your progress. This should have been a good teaching system, but in China, do you choose to complain about the country or improve yourself first?

We are not sure if our actions are closer to the goal.

Some college students have such an idea, but it is still difficult to adhere to. Why? In high school, you encounter any difficulties that you can't break through. There are teachers who teach you the answer. But at the university, no one seems to give you the answer, or give you too many answers. Which one is what you want? It's really hard to say.

Therefore, many students on the way to the goal often do not see whether the direction they insist on is correct, because they lack the ability to judge independently, and always doubt whether their choice is the best, in this fearsome In hesitation, if there is not much progress, I will slowly give up.

There are too many elements of our character in our character.

Some students have seen progress, but they have not finally adhered to it, which is likely to be related to his personality. Psychologists say that people who are used to postponing satisfaction are more likely to succeed.

The concept of postponing the sense of satisfaction may not be clear to the students. Here I share an excerpted story that may be instructive to you.

Not long ago, a 30-year-old financial analyst asked for help, and she wanted to correct the bad habit of delaying work in recent months. We explored her views on the boss, her attitude towards her, her understanding of authority and the situation of her parents.

We also talk about her perception of work and achievement; the impact of these ideas on her view of marriage and gender; her desire to compete with her husband and colleagues, and the fear that competition brings to her. Despite repeated efforts, this routine psychoanalysis and treatment did not touch the crux of the problem. Finally, one day, we entered a field that has been neglected for a long time before the treatment turned around.

“Do you like to eat cake?” I asked. She replied like it.

“You prefer to eat cakes,” I continued, “still the cream on the cake?”

She said excitedly: "Oh, of course it is cream!"

"So, how do you usually eat cakes?" I asked again. I may be the dumbest psychologist ever.

She said without hesitation: "Is that still used to say, I usually eat the cream first, then eat the cake."

In this way, we start from the habit of eating cake and re-discuss her attitude towards work. As I expected, in the first hour of work, she always completed the work that was easy and easy to do, and in the remaining six hours, she tried to avoid the thorns.

I suggest that from now on, the first hour of work, we must first solve the troublesome errands, and in the rest of the time, other work will become relatively easy.

Considering that she is studying financial management, I explain the truth: I work seven hours a day, the pain of an hour, plus the happiness of six hours, obviously more than an hour of happiness, plus six The pain of the hour is cost-effective. She fully agreed with such a calculation method, and resolutely implemented it as such, and soon overcame the bad habit of delaying work.

Postponing the sense of satisfaction means not coping with temporary comfort and re-setting the order of happiness and pain in life: first, facing problems and feeling pain; then, solving problems and enjoying greater happiness is the only viable way of life.

We will replace the real goal with a little success.

There is an effect in psychology. When people strive for a little progress, they tend to reward themselves for indulgence, which makes it easy to get out of the right track. So when you find that you have made a little progress, you must remind yourself to continue to refuel because the goal has not yet been achieved!

Written in the back:

I don't know what kind of reasons you can't insist on, maybe there are more reasons. I want to compare the high school and the university. Let us see a lot of different details. These different details just affect your current behavior. If you want to change, you can only do it for every detail.

I also want to say:

Sticking to a small thing every day will change your personality. I suggest that you start with breakfast on time, which will increase your willpower and enhance your self-control.