Funny words

1. Being poor is good at one's body, and rich is a wife and a group.

2. Occasionally inside the canteen, the soot flies directly to the eyes. Dance to the left and look at the spider. Vomiting, vomiting, vomiting, and frightening flies!

3. Female secretary: "Boss, your wife is on the phone, she said to kiss you on the phone." Boss: "You will take it for me first, and then come over to me."

4. The girl snored the golf ball, a man was hit, her hands were sandwiched between the legs and fell to the ground. The young lady reached out and gently stroked and asked: How? Man: It feels good, but the thumb is very painful. 18, you accidentally sent a photo of the "big dinosaur" to the bamboo, the bamboo is angry, your 5 points are gone...

5. The cat takes a nap and the rat sings: the first snow in 2002. After a few moments, sing: You are my lover. Cat catches the rat: This is the impulsive punishment!

6. Teacher: Please describe the difference between frog and cockroach in a concise language. Small stay: the frog is a conservative - sitting on the ground; the 癞蛤蟆 is a romantic - want to eat swan meat.

7. Today, after work with my colleagues to go to dinner, we ordered a plate of chili scrambled eggs and found that there was root hair inside, then colleagues used chopsticks to clip their hair, shouting, boss ~ ~ You look at what this is? Boss At first glance, I screamed and shouted, come! Give this lady a pair of chopsticks.

8. A: I would rather be a man than a person. This is my principle of life. B: You are so noble! A: No, I am a boxer.

9. Neither cow A nor cow C! 24, Monkey: Hey, give you a wake up, please clarify the signal light during the World Cup, perhaps the so-called red light, it is to watch the free ticket game on the pole!

10. Algebra teacher complains to the parents of the students: You see how your son learns mathematics, 90 minus 45 equals the second half! Father anger: I have to teach him well when I go back, he did not consider the situation of overtime .

11. I wanted to buy a Honda sports car, but in order to support the national industry, boycott R goods, and more importantly, don't make money for the devils, so I plan to buy a Phoenix 28 bicycle.

12. In the evening, I walked on the shore of the unidentified lake and saw a transparent condom floating in the water... It happened that the three Peking University girls passed by, only listening to the sleeves in the water and said: "Look... there is new Variety of jellyfish yeah!"

13. A flower is very fat, like sweets. But she hates ants and sees that she will kill. Others asked why, oh: This little thing, eat sweets, the waist is still so fine!

14. Don't ask the old man to sell fish: Are you fresh in this fish? Sell the old man of fish: Of course! Can't you live all the time? Dumb: You are alive, but are you fresh?

15. Xi'an Academy of Fine Arts) Painted the beauty of the world, the beauty of the world.

16. "Come on, chick, give the uncle a laugh." MM ignored... "That, the chick does not give the grandmother laugh, Grandpa gives you a laugh!"

17. The virgins of the boys and girls are always in pain!!

18. Walking behind the crowded street suddenly rang the whistling whistling sound, but still did not respond, a Buick commercial vehicle hit my shoulder; I did not get angry, just gently took out the key, in it In the process of advancing, I made a beautiful arc from beginning to end~

19. One day the turtle bathed in the river and looked at it. After the tortoise discovered it, he said: Have you ever seen such a beautiful thing? You see that your eyes are coming out! Hey: Sister! Don't tease me, don't you see a goosebump? . .

20. A slutty woman drove a car and slammed a red light. At this time, the police stopped him: You should know why I stopped you. She said with a wink: Of course, but unfortunately, I have another date!

21. A lady in the skirt walked past, and the young man said to her companion: Do you dare to pick up her skirt? The companion did not hesitate to go forward and picked up the lady’s skirt and said: Is this skirt cotton? Miss: Silk .

22. “The child is so cute, is it yours?” The baby boy answered “No”. "Do you have a nephew or a younger brother?" "Not at all, to be honest, I am a contraceptive salesman, and the child is a void return."

23. Dumb said that there is the most yellow joke in history, asking Agua to listen. Agua: Skip it if it is too yellow. Dumb: Good! The joke is about skipping, skipping, skipping... finished!

24. Dad: Xiaoxin, will you drive away the flies on your ice cream, have you heard it? Xiaoxin: Dad, don’t you let me skate, don’t you let it slide here for a while?

25. In the restaurant, female: Are you going to marry me? The man’s silence. Female: Don't think that no one wants me. If you get angry, I will find someone to marry here! The waiter will come over: Miss, you scared away the guests of the store.

26. During the Spring and Autumn Period and the Warring States Period, you commanded the whole handsome man, the top of the pot, the sack, the plastic bag on the waist, the egg yolk pie, the two cabbages, and the unbeaten in the East. When you charge, you shouted: "Who is bad?" Bottle rotten cans are sold out!"

27. The female bird burst into tears; the male said with anger: "How many times have I told you that this ring is put on me by the bird research station, not the wedding ring! I am not married yet!"

28. When you leave me silently, I am very painful, I don't know how to be good, watching your back go away, I hate myself, it's all my fault... Get up early and get on the bus.

29. It takes 5 minutes to wait for a bus, 3 hours to watch a movie, 1 month for a month, and 1 year for a spring. It takes a lifetime to miss a person! If you care about it for 1 second: It’s cool. Put the grass in the nest!

30. Animal guessing. Turtle's ass: prescribed. Turtle upside down: There are provisions on it. Turtle tumbling: one after another. The big turtle has a small turtle on its back: there are new regulations on it.

31. Is the ear itchy? That means I am thinking of you! Is the eye itchy? That means I want to see you! Is it itchy? That means I want to kiss you! Is the body itchy? That means... Don’t think about it, it’s long Hazelnuts, take a shower!

32. Telling one's privacy is a confidant; talking to a group of people about their privacy is a blind eye; talking to the people of the country about their privacy, it is called "art life"!

33. The old lady on the bus is afraid to sit in the station and ask every station. When the car arrived at the station, she slammed the driver with an umbrella: "Is this the exhibition center?" "No, this is the ribs!"

34. Customer: Since I used the raw hair water I bought from you, how did my hair fall out? Salesperson: Not bad, sir. To grow new hair, you must first give it a place.

35. Roll a word, I only say once, I hope you can use action to express!

36. The school invited the experts from the district to give students a lecture on sexual knowledge. As a result, the experts took the afternoon to plan the progress of the birth work. Finally, in order to increase the interest of the girl, the legend of the son-in-law, he asked: Who knows the woman? Why do you want to make people with loess? No one echoes under the stage. The expert is a little embarrassed. He ordered a girl in front of him to answer. The girl whispered: Is she not knowing how to make people? Experts inspire: Why she doesn’t know How to make people? Girl A: Is it because you listened to your lecture?

37. Xuan Zang asks Bodhisattva before the westbound: How does the Buddha look like? Bodhisattva smiles: The Buddha has no regularity, but if there is a face like a full moon, a bald head, a wide body, a hand-held magic weapon, it must be a Buddha. Xuanzang silently remembered that after the Scorpio, looking for people with the above characteristics, I really let him find one. Xuanzang excitedly stepped forward and took the lead: Do you want to be a Buddha? The other said:

38. Xiao Yan took the classmates to play at home. The classmates couldn’t help but ask: Uncle, how did you get this scar? The circle was frozen, and the father sighed. The classmates knew that they had made a mistake, and quickly shifted the topic: Uncle, do you like football?

39. Xiaoqian went to see netizens who had never met before, and repeatedly emphasized that the two are a very pure friendship. After half an hour of going out, Xiaoqian suddenly turned back. Xiaomei asked her why, Xiaoqian said: People forgot to change their underwear.

40. Xiao Ming went to the first grade of the country and always couldn't distinguish between the initials and the finals. The teacher tested him: Which is the initial voice of "Ye" and "Hua"? Xiao Ming A: "The birth mother" Maria.

41. Xiaohua: I want to... Don’t... Xiao Ming: Xiaohua is doing it? Xiaoying: She is peeling the petals to decide whether to give birth to the child. Xiao Ming: What about the other flower? Xiaoying: It is used to decide who is the child!

42. My name is God, the little name is Jesus, the English name is God, the law is like

43. Private school!

44. The world is extremely small and extremely large.