Twenty tips in the negotiations (5)

Dew ugly: How to turn "short-term" into "strength" to cover up ugliness is a human instinct, so the initiative of zero and five ships requires the willpower and courage of power. As for the disadvantages of his own shortcomings and negligence, he will want to cover up and become more and more flawed. It is advisable to take the initiative to expose ugliness. One is to enhance self-confidence and exhaustion; it can be natural and humanized, and criticism of people will be less; thirdly, showing weaknesses and making good use can make people more like. The ugly ugly has the active offensive type of usage: 1 reveals an ugly, covers a hundred ugliness: using people's thinking to have three, actively revealing a five, can make people ignore the rest of the five. 2 So the devils set the trap: to make a mistake inadvertently, let the other party think that it is a bucket of real information, and thus fall into our already established Congress. 3 ugly name, big advertising: the use of people's curiosity, rebellious psychology, and ugly and sorrowful people, etc., unified ugliness, highlight shortcomings, propaganda errors, can achieve surprisingly successful advertising effects. In short, the "Ugly Duckling" can also be loved by people, and become "ugly star". The ugly initiative can make the shortcomings become stronger, and even can seduce the enemy and win the game with "ugly". 1. Dew an ugly, cover the ugly Tang Dynasty, to the officials There is a very strict procedure for the selection of the department, which is the result of the imperial examinations. It is also subject to the examination of the cadres. Li Linyi’s drill camp became the servant of the cadres and mastered the power of the examiner. Soon, he made a slogan and gained political capital. The face is pretending to be upright, and secretly swindling. The cadres are selected for the bureaucrats every year, and they are released on the list. Once, before the release of the list, Xuanzong’s younger brother, Ning Wang, secretly gave Li Linyi a list of 10 people, asking him to be superior. It was also the first time to go to the back door of the election. It was also strictly forbidden at the time. Li Linyi saw the opportunity to collude with Ning Wang. He took the list and was happy. His face was dressed as a difficult one. He said: "Wang Ye must know this. Things are not easy to handle, let alone 10 people come out! "I don't wait for Ning Wang to say anything, Li immediately said, "Wang Ye gave this to me, indicating that Wang Ye trusted me and raised me." The prince is royal and works for the royal family. Can you be afraid of responsibility? "Of course, let Ning Wang happy, on his noble face, showing a soothing look to Li Lin. Li Linyi calculated another idea from this look. "Wang Ye, that's it!" In order to maintain the court's law and discipline, and also suppress others to take the opportunity to private, please allow me to pick one out of these 10 people, dismissed in public, stayed at the top of the list for the next time, recommend a good residence. Li Linyi hides the inner treacherous, showing a loyal, courteous and capable appearance. Ning Wang is naturally happy, and really regards Li Linyi as a loyal person who works for the court and is capable. Appreciation. On the day of the list, Li Linyi said in public: "Someone wants to talk about love, this is the corruption of the court, can not be tolerated! This person cannot choose. "As soon as the words fell, everyone uttered tongues and mutual legends: "The Li Jiao Department, Lian Ning Wang Qing noodles dare to dismiss, it is really clear. Some people even said: "He is so rich and honest, he must be favored by the emperor. Otherwise, can he have this courage?" "This matter was passed to Xuanzong's ear, Longyan Da Yue, said in his heart: "There is such a minister in the DPRK, it must be reused." "Li Lin's feelings and sorrows, but let the ruling and the erroneous thought of loyalty, using the "a ugly cover ugly" method of ugly. This manipulation is the use of people's thinking blind spots: ten people are genuine, no problem, people can not help but doubt : "Is it really worthy of the name? ......" And once there is a problem, people think: "I really don't expect what I expected." I focused my attention on a problematic person and was satisfied. The other nine were taken for granted and avoided. The focus of the review. The fortune teller is the same for fortune telling. He won't say that you are “one hundred things to do”, but that “there is something that is not very smooth, but there is always a way...” and so on. I feel more credible: "Yes, people can't avoid a small disaster." As for the other four things, I was happy to accept it. In the Five Dynasties, there was a man named Wang Xiang. Because his son became a big official, he was rich and powerful. He was extravagant and extravagant, eating, drinking and having fun. He thought he had enjoyed the glory of the world. Rich. The only thing that feels dissatisfied is that I don’t know how old I can live. One day, when he heard the fortune telling on the street, he sent the veteran of the gate to call for fortune telling. The fortune teller is a blind man, he secretly Ask the veteran: "Who is my fortune teller?" The veteran said: "It is our father who has the right to have money. If you are not satisfied, you don't know how long you can live." I told you the old bottom, for a while, when you finish your life, you can give me a little more money! "Fortune teller went to the church and asked about the birth of the character, and put it on the shackles. Just after a calculation, he was deliberately surprised and said: "This life can have a good life! Wang Xiangyi was very happy and asked him: "Can you live to seventy?" The fortune teller smiled and said: "More! Still much! "Wang Xiang asked again: "Can you live eighty or ninety? "The blind man laughed and said: "I have to say more! "Can you live a hundred years old?" "The sigh sighed and said: "At least one hundred and thirty years old!" "Wang Hao is very happy. He also asked: "Will you have any pain in the middle of these years? "The blind man said: "No! Then, the scorpion made a detailed calculation of the scorpion, and said with a more certain tone: "I really can’t think of sorrow and pain. It’s just that when I’m one hundred and twenty, I will have a stomachache during the spring and summer. The little illness, after a while, will naturally be good. "Wang Xiang is very happy. He turned back and said that the children and grandchildren standing behind him said: "You remember me carefully. In that year, don't give me cold soup! "2. Dare to reveal "the true face of the mountain" Su Dongpo once had a poem: "I don't know the true face of the mountain, only the body is in this mountain." According to this intention, it is difficult for a person to see his own shortcomings and shortcomings. The author is contrary to the meaning of why people can not actively expose their "face to the real face", and let others know the real "I"? Recently, the author has read a book written by a Japanese scholar on communicative psychology, which is quite inspired. In the book: If people see their own shortcomings or weaknesses, people will think that you are authentic and not false. Conversely, if people don't understand your true personality, that is, if you don't see a person with shortcomings and weaknesses, you will be relieved, alert and alert you, and you will not be close to yourself. This is really I think that the straightforward, frank, free and unconstrained people in real life are often close to and loved by people. The reason why Binduyou are the same is probably the reason! Therefore, I advise young friends who are often worried about their weaknesses and weaknesses, and who are relaxed and relaxed. However, they are not good at exposure. The shortcomings or weaknesses of one's own are another matter. It is a good thing to expose it properly. It is the perfection, modification and beautification of one's own "original face". If it is not well exposed, it will be ugly. It is unfavorable to make a living by yourself. Therefore, it is necessary to pay attention to the artistry when revealing the true face of the mountain. 1 The shortcomings of accidentality should be immediately recognized and corrected. The occasional shortcomings are mostly due to the lack of self-cultivation in peacetime. If you have such a problem, you don't have to panic. Let's talk about the real recognition. Don't cover up and justify. For example, a young lady presides over a knowledge contest and inadvertently puts Li Bai's verses that are "naturally useful." Said to be Du Fu's poems, suddenly laughed downstairs. But the young lady did not panic, immediately smiled and admitted and corrected: "Because my culture is not enough, I just mistakenly said Li Bai's verse as a cuckoo. The laughter of everyone is a goodwill criticism and friendly love for me. thank you all. "There was a round of applause from the audience. Isn't this applause a reward for her frankness? 3 The shortcomings of long-termness should be concealed and contrived. Some mistakes, shortcomings, weaknesses can not be changed at once. This is generally a negative aspect of the character that people form in life. Some are still physical defects, and they are not subjective. But for this, you must not always be jealous of others as saying "shadow". Even people who talk about "lights" are very sensitive. In fact, acknowledging their own deficiencies is not to deceive themselves, but to evaluate their performance correctly by strength. If you consciously conceal, cover up or taboo your own shortcomings, Inevitably, it produces counter-action in itself, making itself bluff and rude and arrogant. Once people get rid of this responsibilities, their hearts are calm and steady, their strengths are highlighted, and others like him. The movie "Under the mountain In the garland, there is a "Tiger" platoon leader, and the image he shows to people is straightforward and enjoyable. His unforgiving mouth Like the cannon Jane, as long as he looks right is wrong, and you will be arguing with the king of the king, even Zhao Zisheng, who is higher than the child instructor, is also afraid of him three points. Just this hot temper and the cannon, the mouth is simple, can’t help but say The shortcomings that can't be changed at one time. However, he is very calm, he claims to be "the famous cannon Jane of the whole group". His shortcomings are such as exploring the mountains, squatting at the river, naturally in front of the people, and never concealing and Because of this, all the cadres and soldiers of the company understand him, trust him, and love him. It can be seen that the shortcomings formed in the long-term life are naturally violent, not terrible, the problem is not to cover up. It is even more annoying. 3 The shortcomings of others break through, be open-minded and willing to accept. Because of kind care and sincere love, sometimes others will directly or indirectly point out shortcomings or weaknesses that you have not realized. Don't be embarrassed, but you can't be dissatisfied or even angry because you are uncomfortable on the face. Maintaining your own shortcomings is a sign of weakness. You should listen to people's words humbly and let people finish speaking. If the other party It is the fact, it makes sense, it should be accepted immediately, express gratitude, and at the same time show that it is determined to correct. If it is not true, he can explain it in a bold way, affirming that people's motives are good, but they must not argue too much or even get angry. 4 Deliberately say your own shortcomings when necessary. As mentioned above, letting the other party know their shortcomings will not only weaken the other party's trust in themselves, but will increase their trust in themselves. Under certain conditions, the shortcomings may also Turned into advantages. For example, a pair of young men and women fell in love, and soon after talking, the young women specifically told the young men: "I have a shortcoming, that is, love to dress, like snacks. "This is to intentionally let the other party understand their shortcomings, but also the temptation and test of the other side. After a period of observation, the young man said to her: "You love dressing, it is the performance of beauty, is a reflection of social progress." As for snacking, it is fine to eat it properly. I like your frankness. "Look, take the initiative to let the other party know their shortcomings, but it is a favorite. In short, there is no gold in the red, no one is perfect, and dare to reveal the "face of the mountain" is the best policy. British prose writer Thomas Carlisle once said: " The biggest mistake is not consciously making mistakes. "Acknowledging that one's own shortcomings and faults will enhance self-understanding, and thus create self-confidence. Sometimes we have to wait until we see and accept what we have done to truly understand our own abilities. When we are willing to admit mistakes, In fact, this is a very safe thing. Because we are more humane by admitting mistakes, and making others' views on us more human, so that others have less criticism. If we stubbornly refuse to admit mistakes, it is To use the toughness in the wrong place, this is called "stubbornness can not choose good." This is one of the biggest shortcomings. The performance of US President Nixon in the Watergate incident fully demonstrates the stubborn and unsatisfactory personality, hard to cover up The inside story of the Watergate scandal, the result of which wants to cover up, has caused a lot of flaws, and finally let the people of the country and members of Congress think that the president has lied and deceived them. At this time, they want to support him, and they feel powerless. At the beginning of the incident, if Nixon would open the city The public announcement of the truth, it is likely that the American people will not force him to step down because of this small matter, because the United States has served as president I have done this kind of thing, but no one has made a mistake. Just because Nixon is stubborn and can't choose good, so that he step by step to the road to failure, the person who hears can be without warning! 3. Be good at playing his own The shortcoming is the story that happened in Japan: a gentleman with a five-tone instinct is very popular with singing. Whenever everyone gathers, he will certainly be brought to the stage with numerous applause. He can’t refuse everyone’s enthusiasm, so he has to sing every time. The same song, that is Mr. Watanabe, who is called "Abin" by his colleagues. Abin is very clever. Whenever someone asks him to sing, he will skillfully use his own five insufficiency and sing the beauty of Miss Skylark. Songs - the sky in May. Incredibly, as long as the song of Abin sings out, the other beautiful melodies are eclipsed, and they can't compete with the songs of Abin. When colleagues ask him to sing, they will definitely Very neatly sing with the melody of an advertising song: "The five-tone incomplete Watanabe, sing a song! Although singing badly, people have a headache, please sing a song! After a long-awaited call, Ah Bin finally came out with a smile on his face. After pushing the old black glasses with his right middle finger, he sang in a straight posture: "May sky, sun It’s rising again...” He was always so serious, singing this unchanging song right and wrong, no matter where he went, it’s always a slow, half-shooting. When he started singing “May...” At the same time, the speed was normal, and when I sang "Sky..." it was amazingly slow. Ah Bin was neither shy nor fearful, and continued to sing with his serious expression. He listened to him singing. Almost all smiled and bent, and my eyes suddenly flowed out of the moving tears, unable to stop. When everyone laughed and gasped, Abin continued to sing; the sun... rose again... "Everybody Hearing here, I can’t help but laugh and lean forward! However, there is no contempt in the laughter of everyone, because the gentle personality of Abin has eased the slightly stiff atmosphere in the venue. He doesn't show off his strengths on stage like some people who think they can sing. On the contrary, he creates happiness for everyone in another style. After listening to his songs, people feel that the blood is smooth, refreshing, and the charm of this "five-tone incomplete" is really great! Like singing, people always have the deficiencies of doing things or their own conditions. As long as we are good at playing our own shortcomings, it will become our characteristics and will not be looked down upon. The so-called "five-star" is also remembered and loved because of its "ugly". In short, there is a small defect, it is not necessary to have a feeling of inferiority, and if you take the courage to do it naturally, you will become weaker and stronger, and even be liked by everyone. For example, some people feel inferior because they are not standard. In fact, this is one of the shortcomings we should play more. If you can keep the human feelings of your hometown in your speech, and at the same time you can talk to people in a rational common language, it is the most ideal way to learn the advantages of both languages. People born in different places need to communicate in common language; if they are in a gathering of people from the same place, or in local companies, institutions, counters, etc., everyone knows that they are fellow villagers, but they also use immature common language. That is very disappointing. Because people do not consider the intimate characteristics when they make common language, it does not give people a warm feeling. We should pay special attention to this counter effect. In addition, in business dealings, briefings in various regions, and hospitality for foreign guests, and the skillful use of hometown language will increase the intimacy of each other. Therefore, as long as the original feeling of inferiority is excluded, the light speaks loudly and loudly, and gradually makes the content of what he says richer and more lively, then no matter what occasion or situation, he will not be afraid. 4. Therefore, when the princes entered the Tang Emperor Xuanzong, there were Li Shizhi and Li Linyi, both of whom were prime ministers. The two people are not in harmony with each other, but they are very polite on the surface. Tang Xuanzong was ruined in wine color, and he was extravagant and extravagant. He made the treasury look empty, and the Manchu dynasty was very anxious. B night thought to open a bottle to save money. Finally, the emperor also felt the financial threat, and let the two prime ministers think of ways. The situation is forced, the two are very anxious. However, Li Linyi’s main concern is how to fight against political opponents and monopolize power. Looking at Li Shizhi like an ant on a hot pot, Li Lin City gave birth to a poison meter. After the pilgrimage, the two were idle, and Li Lin pretended to inadvertently say that Huashan received the gold. When he saw that Li Yunzhi’s eyes were bright, he knew that the purpose had been reached, and he opened the topic and said something else. Li Daozhi really counted, he was too busy to go home, wash his hands and grind ink to write a chapter, and stated the idea of mining Huashan gold mine to use the national treasury. Tang Xuanzong saw the big joy in the chapter, and he called Li Linyi to discuss the decision. Li Linzhen pretends to be like a word, Xuanzong is anxious: a word to talk about! "Li Lin pressed the voice before and pretended to be mysterious and said: "Who does Huashan have gold?" It’s just that Huashan is the royal dragon. Once the mine breaks the feng shui, the national work is hard to measure. “Xuanzong listened and nodded. At that time, the feng shui theory was prevailing, and the Feng Shui dragon veins and descendants were able to bless the national transport. Now I heard Li Shizhi’s saying. Of course, this is a bad idea. Xuanzong’s heart is certainly not happy. Li Lin City can see that he can take advantage of it. He said: "Listen to people, Li Shizhi often talks about the end of life. It is quite a bit of a remark. Maybe this mine is being feng shui. The idea is that he intentionally--"Xuanzong was upset and went to the post. Li Linyi saw the purpose and reached his heart. Since then, Xuanzong saw Li Shizhi and felt dissatisfied. Finally, he found a fault and dismissed him. The imperial court’s real power fell into the hands of Li Linyi. It’s also a kind of ugliness when it’s not tightly spoken. If you intentionally sell it, you can achieve the goal of winning by ugly. When you speak consciously through seemingly aphasia The language form, "unintentionally" revealed to the listener some kind of false information, so that the other party believes in the truth, so that the middle of the speaker is in the arms. Zhang's sister A borrower gives the writings found, very anxious Zhang gave her out of an idea, a few days later, my sister laughs and says:. "IOU lunged up. "It turned out that my sister sent a telegram according to his idea and asked the borrower to quickly return ZI00. However, the borrower actually borrowed only 1,200 yuan. After reading the telegram, he was very angry. He wrote back and said, "I only borrow 1200 yuan from you. you. You don't want to say with conscience..." My sister deliberately wrote 1,200 yuan as 2,100 yuan, revealing flaws and letting the borrower correct it. It is equivalent to writing up the loan. After the sister has "debit", she writes an apology, saying that it is written as 2100 yuan. It is a typo, asking for forgiveness. 5. Lu ugly advertising in the traditional cultural concept, people are very taboo "family ugly and external". In the commodity business, this is even more so, "Wang Po sell melon, self-selling boast", most operators They are widely publicizing how good their products are. Over time, people become bored with it, leading to suspicion and distrust. “Family ugliness” is just the opposite. Operators stand in the position of consumers. Disclosure of problems in products, sincere hospitality, heart-to-heart, and establish an honest corporate image in people's minds, in exchange for customer trust and favor of products, and expand market share. One day, American Henry Food Processing Mr. Hawkins, the general manager of the industrial company, found out from the product test report sheet that the products they produce play a role in preserving additives in food formulations. Poison. Although not very toxic, long-term use is harmful to the body. He knows that other food companies also use this toxic additive. He thinks that if the public is released from the perspective of safeguarding the public interest, it will definitely cause peers. Their strong opposition, they will certainly unite to rectify the land, his business will certainly suffer a lot of losses. But in the struggle with these peers, his popularity will certainly be greatly improved, and will also receive public support, thus Conducive to the company's development and long-term interests. So, at a press conference, he resolutely announced to the public that the preservative was poisonous and harmful to the health. The public shook and praised his honesty. However, this move offended The bosses of food processing. They united and attacked Henry by all means, accusing him of having ulterior motives and wanting to destroy other people's business. They jointly boycotted the products of Henry, and the operation of Henry Company was on the verge of bankruptcy. Just in him At a time when the family was ruined, the reputation was well known and supported by the government and society. The products of the company have become popular goods that people use with confidence, and the supply is in short supply. The profitability of the bankruptcy has recovered in a short time, and the scale of operation has doubled more than before. The development continues on this basis. Later, his company became the largest company in the US food processing industry. In this information-rich society, if you want to convince others, you can no longer use "this is the first in the country" or one of the best in the world. The old advertising words are boasting. No matter how loudly you say, no one else will look back. Recent publicity advertisements seem to have taken into account the use of ugliness to create a sense of humor and interest to impress people. There is a car company that claims to be able to create the "best car in the world". One of their ads is like this; the whole photo focuses on the driver's seat. There is a line of text underneath, saying, 'Sorry, you can hear the ticking of the clock while driving. "On the surface, it is an apology statement, but in fact it is boasting about their car. It runs completely without the sound of an engine. It is very quiet. "Ugly" can "show face" in advertising because it can capture consumption. The two kinds of psychology: the pursuit of freshness and rebellious psychology. The chairman of the US Ai Shanglong company, Xi Nai once walked in the suburbs, still saw a few children playing a dirty and unusually ugly insect, and put it down. Bushiton Think of it: the toys sold in the market are generally beautiful. If you produce some ugly toys, what will happen? So, he arranged his own company to develop an "ugly toy" and quickly launched it to the market. "Ugly Toys" brought benefits to Wentulong Company, which envied the peers. So "ugly toys" came one after another, such as "crazy ball" is a string of small balls, printed with many ugly faces; The rude coward of rubber, with orange hair, green skin and a pair of bloated and bloodshot eyes, will make a very unpleasant sound when you blink. These ugly toys sell more than normal toys, but they have been selling well, and they have set off a wave of marketing "ugly toys" in the United States. In this case, we can also see people mournful about ugly things. The feelings of this are also the reasons for the success of the ugly. There are also successful examples of ugly advertisements in China. At the time of cracking down on counterfeit and shoddy goods, there is a store that has a big book on the billboard at the door: "This shop specializes in fakes." Courage! When people are indignant, they can’t help but enter the store to see what they are. When they look in it, they know that they are fooled: it turns out that this “fake” is not the “fake” of “fake” or “forgery” but “artificial” The "fake" of manufacturing - wigs, dentures, prostheses... This store is a mystery, and it’s a big joke with the customers, it will really attract business!

Twenty tips in the negotiations (5)

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