Have you discovered that your dreams have changed?

1

My cousin, after graduating from college, under her father's "effort", successfully entered the only junior high school in the town and became a math teacher. Her father is a language teacher at that middle school. They changed from father to daughter to colleagues.

However, this is not what the cousin is happy with. She doesn't like the town because it is too cold; she doesn't like the youth in the town. They are doing nothing, just waiting for the demolition, and then taking a large amount of compensation, living in the resettlement house, and marrying their children.

She said to me: In the town, you can look at your future at a glance.

The chair in her father's office, which has been "sit-out", is proof. She is going to spend her youth on her "chair."

At that time, I had not graduated and I was confused about the future. I am not qualified to give her advice, just comfort her: work, do it first, after all, it is an iron rice bowl, with preparation, work is easy, income is stable.

She promised.

Every half month, she would call me, so that her roommate thought she was one of my "invisible" girlfriends. We talked for a long time and talked for more than an hour without knowing it. She kept complaining to me - the students were naughty, the colleagues were wonderful, the parents were difficult, and the work was boring.

I advised her to adjust her mind and try to like her work.

She said that she worked hard but could not do it.

She finally decided to take a postgraduate degree.

I asked her: What is the purpose of the postgraduate study?

She replied: PubMed is the only way to safely leave the town.

Yes, the postgraduate is successful, her father will not stop her from continuing to study, can resign from school in a proper way, can leave the deserted town, can go to the prosperous world of flowers and flowers, to find a reliable youth love.

She announced her decision to the family. Unsurprisingly, the family objected, and the relatives tried hard to persuade her - don't give up a good job of "others ask for it". In the name of "love," they kidnapped her and imprisoned her. They kept pouring cold water, and they used "language violence" to make her bruises.

These, she has endured silently.

She began to review and use all the spare time. After work, the nest is in the dormitory, not leaving the house. The cold weather has never stopped.

The most difficult thing is two months before the test. The cold is coming, and the support of the loved ones is even more devastating. She called me and complained to me. I could only say something that was not painful and it would not help her.

All I can do is wait for her message.

She got what she wanted. Everything went very smoothly. In the second year, she went to a place where the whole year was warm and spring, and she went to study.

Going home during the summer vacation, I saw her. She doesn't look very happy. Speaking of the future, her attitude is dull.

I said: Your dreams have come true, you should feel happy.

She said: I think so too, but I don't know why, I just can't be happy, just like eating quick-drying vegetables in instant noodles. Although it looks like that, the taste has already changed.

2

Why, when you realize your dreams and get what you want, you are not happy?

Because in the process of chasing dreams, we have been hindered, suffered from other people's opposition, doubts, misunderstandings and ridicule, we feel tired. The pain of pursuing, dispelling the happiness after the wish.

I believe that the cousin's father is really good for her, and her relatives are all well-intentioned, but they don't know that the cousin who has a "glass heart" does not want a stable income and life. It is the richness of the mind, the freedom of the spirit, and the diversity of the feelings. The monotony and boringness of the town will only make her feel ruined. There is no such thing as her attachment, so she wants to leave.

The two generations are very different in their understanding. The older generation thought that they occupied the advantage of experience. They took the authority of their fathers and opposed the cousin’s dream-by-dream, and placed the cousin in a lonely and helpless situation. Although their objections are limited to language, they are all the cousin's close relatives, so their opposition has caused tremendous psychological pressure on the cousin.

In the process of pursuing dreams, we were forced by the limitations of reality to make many compromises and make many corrections to our dreams. In the end, the results became a product of a big discount.

The result was regrettable, the horse became a scorpion, the mansion became an apartment, the champion became the runner-up, and Ben became the second. We can only accept it, we can only accept it as a difficult one, and comfort ourselves in our hearts: the second best thing is to retreat.

However, the horse is a horse after all, and the champion is the champion. What you get is not what you want. The difference is a thousand miles. How can you really accept the results of "imperfect" and "incomplete"?

After the dream is realized, you suddenly realize that it is not the case. After the things that have been dreaming of the soul, after exposing the truth, it is just a beautiful feather. You are so disappointed.

I thought that the university campus is a paradise for knowledge. It is a beautiful and sacred place to go. But one day, we are in it, only to find that it is full of the smell of stinky socks and instant noodles. It is a common thing to skip classes, and incompetent teachers abound. There are only a handful of students who focus on academics. Corruption, pornography, violence, games, and these elements that are considered inappropriate are inevitably infiltrated into the campus.

The ideal plump and realistic skinny, can you not let your heart falter?

3

So how do we happily chase our dreams?

When I was in the company, our department organized activities and went to a temple to listen to a Buddhist monk. Gao Yan was so inscrutable, I heard the clouds in the fog. At the end, Gao Song is an inscription for each of us. I like the words of Gao Song, so I thought about it and asked him what words to ask.

Some of my colleagues have asked for "circle and harmony," and some have asked for "going to morality." Some people want "high-spirited", and some people want "big sky." When I come to me, I said: I want to "keep my own way."

Colleagues say that this is a derogatory term, not good. Fortunately, the sorghum only writes, does not ask the content, between the strokes, writes the words "I am willing to go", and has been hanging in my study.

"I want to go it alone", my understanding is: look for an idea, regardless of other people's irresponsible remarks, just let yourself go forward.

In my opinion, this is the psychological quality that must be cultivated in pursuit of dreams.

To give an example: I changed the house last year, and the big thing about changing the house, of course, is to bring the parents and the wife of the wife to the staff. I chose a big house in the yard and thought it was good. The results were unanimously opposed, and they listed various reasons to prove that my vision was terrible. For example, the lighting is not good, the tide is back, the mosquitoes are many, and even the feng shui can be said.

But they don't know at all. The reason why I change the house is to have a yard, to plant weeds in it, to raise some small fish, to lie in the chair at night and look up at the stars and think about it. If there is no yard, I don't have to change rooms at all.

Therefore, each person's needs are different, and other people's opinions only have reference value, but the decisive factor is always your own essential needs. You must listen to your inner preferences, otherwise you are living for others.

Some dreams are huge, and it is desperate to think of it. For example, in a city with a lot of money, you have a house of your own. For example, the rookie in the workplace sneaked at the bosses who were so excited and star-studded, and secretly vowed that one day, I would become a person like him.

In order to make the dream come true, it is not so difficult to get to the sky. It is a good idea to take apart the huge dream, divide it into a small project, and set a staged result for each small plan. Reward yourself in real time after achieving milestones.

I do performance management in the enterprise. A company that wants to establish a performance management system is a very large and complex project. First sort out the company's strategic goals, then break down the goals into departments, then implement them into specific positions, then develop job responsibilities, set assessment targets, and so on. People who have a little management knowledge will definitely feel big when they see it here. These are just the first steps of the Long March.

If you can't eat an elephant in one bite, you can divide it into a few mouthfuls of sputum, and every time you eat a bite, give yourself a reward, which will make you feel full of enthusiasm and rush to the target. When I set up a performance system in the enterprise, I first set up a total work plan. The plan consists of several small plans. After each project is completed, a phased result will be achieved. Every time I achieve a result, I will take two days off, go on a short trip, or have a hearty dinner with a petty bourgeoisie.

If I am boring, I may not be able to wait until I have completed all the plans. I am already exhausted and am on the verge of collapse.

In the process of chasing dreams, we become strong, powerful, super-powerful, like "Xiaoqiang" can not be flat, can not be pressed; like the Spider-Man wearing underwear can do anything; like the bright pigs The fierce singer, the dog is running everywhere. This may be more beneficial and beautiful than touching the dream. If there is really a pie in the sky, then the person who eats the pie must be the one who looks up at the sky and opens his mouth. They wait, and wait for more effort than others.