To embrace the fate - even if the legendary cold door is hard to come out

Recently, two articles from the Internet have become very popular. One is that it is difficult to talk about the cold door, and the other is to talk about not marrying the Phoenix man.

Let me tell the story of several girls first, all of my college classmates.

My undergraduate school is a one-of-a-kind school. Most of the students in such schools have one thing in common: the family is ordinary and even poor, and learning hard.

H and M are my roommates. H's hometown is a village in a famous poor county. She is the first female college student in their village. Yes, the first, female, college students. When I first said it, I didn't believe it, 21st century!

H said, yes, her middle school is reading in the county. She lives in the school and goes home for two hours. Her classmates in the country and the middle school are basically married. I am so stupid to ask: "Is not legally married?" H said that she was married first in the village, and then received the certificate, the children would play soy sauce, and went to accompany her aunt to get more.

H has a younger sister, a younger brother, and the younger brother is only a small country. She said that they are like this in the village, have children, have been born to have a son. When her mother was pregnant with her brother, she said that if she had a daughter, she would give a relative who would not give birth. Fortunately, it is a boy. H has always been grateful to her parents, because their parents are raising H as a boy. In their village, only boys are raised to high school, and only boys are raised to go to college.

H has been studying hard until he is in love. The boyfriend is a graduate of the middle school. Now he is a soldier, and his family is also a rural country. He has nothing. When H went back to his house, he said to us that there is really nothing left. Inspirational article

H's parents knew that they were in a hurry. The phone in our dormitory is a bit bad. The voice of the receiver is louder than the hands-free. When I want to save money, I use the 201 phone card to call, mostly by her mother. I know how angry M's mother is.

Later, we learned that H's mother always thought this way: her daughter graduated from college, and she is already very great in the county. She should marry a good family, what is a good family? It is a rich man. Now my boyfriend has nothing at home, how can I marry? In the phone we learned from the obscure dialect: "We have raised you from college, you have graduated from a country, and you have no money, our Where is the face?"

After that, H received a call from the seven aunts, eight aunts, and even the younger teacher... to persuade her to break up. H was defeated by a relative's sentence: "Your parents are raising you as a son, your brother and sister will ask you to raise." After graduating from college, H chose "rewarding parents" and went back to the county to do it. Teacher, and raise the younger brother and sister with a meager salary. I asked her, working in other places, can also send money back? She said that she had to take the sister of Shangguo to live with her to take care of, the middle school in the county is better than the township middle school, and later the younger brother, she Can only go home.

M is a Hui, but fell in love with a Han boy. They have argued many times because of pork problems. Most of the time, they are eating out. His boyfriend forgot to buy food with a halal mark. The boy loved her very much and decided to get married and become a Hui.

After a year, the boy’s parents also accepted the son’s change to the Hui. At this time, the boy’s grandfather passed away, the boy was the only grandson, and M’s mother did not allow the boy to guard the spirit and hoe. The reason is that their Hui people do not believe this. After that, it was even more ridiculous. M's mother said that after they got married, they could go back to the boy's house and not allowed to eat at the boy's house.

The boy’s mother said that she would prepare a complete set of halal cutlery, including pots and pans, and M’s mother still refused. The boy’s parents collapsed: “I raised my son in his twenties and married a wife. Is it not allowed to eat at home?” M and the boy split the problem... once she cried, Why is she going to be a Hui? We are helpless, because your parents are Hui.

X is my classmate, we are research friends. When she decided to take the postgraduate entrance examination, her parents always opposed it and persuaded her to give up in three days. Her parents are ordinary civil servants. I feel that it is useless for my daughter to study again. It is better to be a civil servant. Later, we did not test well, we went to ask about the application to transfer back to the school.

A classmate was admitted to the school, jokingly said, or do you both directly prepare the room card to the dean? The answer we got from the college is that it is basically impossible to transfer back to the school. From the college building, X cried: Prepared for so long, what has not been eaten? It is better to be researched.

Later, X accepted the home to arrange for the examination of civil servants, entered the interview, and arranged at home to become a civil servant. She said that going around and returning to the fate of family arrangements. Of course, in the eyes of others, X is very lucky, she can be arranged to become a civil servant. However, that is not her dream. Just like someone admire her has a pair of beautiful shoes, but the shoes do not fit.

They are all good girls, simple minds, love life, study hard, just, go around, we all accept the fate brought by the family, like a birthmark.

Go back to the two articles at the beginning of the article. Was it born in the cold, was it wrong? Born in a poor family, was it wrong?

During my internship, I worked as a high school language teacher for half a year. Most of the students were farmers. One student at a time asked me how to learn chemistry. My first reaction, do you tease me? I said, go to the chemistry teacher. The student went on to say that his country’s chemistry is not good. I said, then you can go to buy a chemistry teacher in your country and relearn. He said that he is a township middle school. If they don't have a chemistry teacher in the country, they don't have a chemistry class. He only took 15 points in the middle school chemistry. Other subjects scored well before they were admitted to high school. He heard that science is good to find a job, want to study science, but the chemistry is too bad. For a long time, the student’s serious look I have been hard to forget.

There is also a student who once showed me one of his practice pens, called "Golden Back." He wrote that his father was a coal miner in the coal mine. He went to the coal mine with his father and exported it at the coal kiln. He understood why the money brought back by his father had black ash, and why his father went home and fell asleep.

Ten minutes before the Chinese class are pre-class lectures and student teacher comments. Once, one student said how hard it is to test the education and how harmful the college entrance examination is. I looked at the whole class and nodded and smiled. The tension in my heart was hard to tell. A heart threw herself into the throat. When he finishes his lecture before class, what should he say? To endorse him is to deny the value of their study; to deny him, but our education does have problems; not to say that his voice is loud and sound? He finished, students are Waiting for my comment.

I said: "As the students said, the college entrance examination has indeed erased your creativity and deprived you of the joy of youth. But, in my opinion, for you, for many of our farmers, the college entrance examination is already relative. A system of fairness. The fairness of the current college entrance examination system is that at least you clearly know that you can change your life and change the life of your family." My heart shouted, my words are fake, but What can I do? Do you tell them that the world is still "Zhumen wine smelly, the road has frozen bones", telling them that the world is very realistic, children are too naive?

After that class, I began to be afraid to be a teacher. I was afraid of my students. Those hardworking and serious farmer children told me after they had broken their blood and they couldn’t do anything about their own experiences. I am afraid they tell me, teacher, the world is not what you said. Fear of them saying that their dreams are just as commonplace as others are at their fingertips.

I am not a good teacher. I can't let them see the world and understand the principles of life. I only hope that they still believe and believe that their efforts are meaningful. I believe they can make changes. I believe they can get out of this basin. I believe that their parents can enjoy their old age like their parents in the city, instead of spending their hair and still licking their heads.

Later, I contacted my classmates and asked them about the status quo. H said that she teaches and saves money, expecting her younger siblings to grow up and be able to take care of themselves. She is still trying to get the understanding of her parents and her boyfriend. When the boyfriend retires, they will consider where to live.

M said that they are getting married soon. She is trying to convince her mother to let go of her stubborn prejudice and accept that they can cook with new tableware, family and beauty.

X said that she is still reading the postgraduate study, her research is her dream, she will not give up.

Even if we are still knocked down by their respective destinies, we believe that change can be made.

Born in the cold door, is it wrong? Born in a poor family, is it wrong? No one can choose their own origin, and if I can, I am willing to reincarnate the British royal family. But your superior origin, or what you call "life experience", should not be a tool to hurt others and "get some energy."

I am particularly disgusted with the so-called "truth" and "negative energy". Just like a group of vicious people telling children when they are young, go to chase dreams and boldly chase your life! Wait for him or her to smash their blood. Sneer: "This world is so realistic, your picture is broken!"

A group of people without dreams are awake and no one is allowed to fall asleep.

You didn't eat the grapes. Why do you tell others that the grapes are sour? You buried your dreams yourself, why do you want to bury them with other people's dreams?

I used to watch the Shan Hai Jing and remember a story. Yumeng, who lived in the Yuki Kingdom near the mountains, they have human figures, but they have a pair of short wings that can fly but not far. They stood on the edge of the mountain all day, trying to fly a little farther with their wings, and then fly a little further, but always fell down, always fiasco, and repeated.

Now, I still like this story. If I am a feather, I will try to fly a little farther with my short wings, and then a little further, even if it is full of blood, at least I have experienced the taste of flying.